文字獄

文字獄

大宅

 

柳宗元被逮了,獄中遇到了李白,問因何入獄?

李說:「造謠罪。飛流直下三千尺,人家丈量了,沒那麼長」。

柳說:「彼此彼此,我說了句千山鳥飛絕,有人舉報樹上還有一隻」。

 

正感嘆時,杜牧進來了,大家忙問,你是怎麼進來的?

杜牧說:「唉,涉嫌風化問題。」

大伙異口同聲的說:「是不是停車坐愛楓林晚」?

杜說:「是,說老子涉嫌車震!」敗壞社會風氣。

 

這時,陸游也罵罵咧咧的進來了,大家忙問:「你是為何?」

陸游道:我寫了句「勿言牛老行苦遲,我今八十耕猶力。」

說俺老牛吃嫩草,八十歲還想要包二奶。

 

這時,李清照被收監路過,眾人驚問,弱女子怎麼了。

李清照答曰:「常記溪亭日暮,沈醉不知歸路。」

我涉嫌酒駕拘留。

眾人皆嘆。

 

這時蘇軾推門而入,大家納悶:"你又何事"

蘇軾嘆 “涉黃",我只不過寫了句「橫看成嶺側成峰,遠近高低各不同。」

他們說我偷看女人,動機不純!"

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