什麼是「幸福」？
惟雯說故事
「愛」是什麼？
所謂的「家人」是什麼？
所謂的「幸福」又是什麼？
這位七年級生名叫大師兄，是殯儀館的冰庫管理員。
他說：「愈接近死亡的人，愈能感受生命的意義，看多了，財富真的不重要了！」
一般遺體送至殯儀館，一律經由他們確認、入庫。若是遇上找不到家屬、沒有葬儀社願意接手的案子，例如自殺、意外、街友、孤獨老人等，他們也會親自前往現場接回遺體。
2018年12月，這位大師兄出版《你好，我是接體員》一書，以幽默筆調記錄殯儀館工作現場的百態。例如「吊死叫盪鞦韆、跳樓是小飛俠、腐屍是綠巨人、燒炭是小黑。太胖的人燒遺體時會發爐，舍利子其實是結石……」
在這些與死亡交手的人眼中，每一個冰櫃就是一個故事。
這些名稱看似可怕，其實最令人寒心的往往是人情。
家人不是有血緣的人，而是你走了後會惦記你的人
俄國文豪托爾斯泰曾說，「幸福的家庭都是相似的，不幸的家庭則各有各的不幸。」在殯儀館，這句話總能得到驗證。
所有家族內部的愛恨情仇，往往會隨死亡浮上檯面。
大師兄說，每次聯合公祭後，總有許多家屬因為遺產分配不均、和死者的紛爭未了等因素，藉故不領取骨灰。無主的骨灰年復一年累積，最後只能倒在公墓旁的土地，或直接當垃圾處理。
在意外、自殺現場看過不少駭人的屍體，但師兄認為，最可怕的並非屍體本身，而是漠不關心的家屬。
「常有人說不結婚生子，老了會很慘，死了都沒人幫忙收屍。我其實很想告訴他們，殯儀館有一堆子孫滿堂、沒人要領的骨灰。」
在殯儀館，他看過許多光怪陸離的故事：
有子女隨意把父母的骨灰裝進乖乖桶，或者乾脆倒掉。
還有一個車禍過世的死者。除了一個受刑人兒子外，沒有其他家屬探望。兒子看著父親因意外而扭曲的臉孔，只說了一句話：「我就是來看你怎麼死的，真的不得好死。」父子一場，最後只剩下恨與怨懟。師兄感嘆地說：「這也是血緣啊。」
所謂親情，有時無關血緣或法律。一對父母離異的兄弟，分隔多年後，哥哥自殺，警方聯繫弟弟前來認屍。但因兩人30多年未見，這位前來認屍的男子，一時也無法確認眼前的大體身分。看著遺體，他只說，「雖然我不知道你是不是哥哥，但我感受得到。你的喪事我一肩扛起，希望你能好走。」相信了，就是家人。
上億身家，也不一定能買到幸福的人生，看過形形色色的死者，也讓人對財富有新的思考。「每次去豪宅接大體，不是生病走的，就是吸毒死的。」師兄說起最近經手的一個案子，死者在豪宅裡吸毒致死，屍水滲出，幾乎弄壞了整片高級木質地板。儘管家人俱在，卻無人願意出面處理，只剩下房東欲哭無淚。
另一個案例，則是大師兄看見財富如何引出人性的黑暗面。曾有死者的女兒和弟弟因遺產問題在告別式上爭吵，雙方一言不合，女兒一腳飛踢了自己的叔叔。「那場面超帥的。」師兄笑說。是黑色幽默，也是家族的悲劇。
他也見過有家屬想把貴重首飾燒給死者，卻一轉身就被不肖的喪葬業者取走。
甚至有化妝師會事前準備假戒指，替換遺體手上的真戒指。子女的孝心，最後全進了陌生人的口袋。
其實，財富生不帶來，死帶不走。遺體火化過後，工作人員常會在火化爐當中找到一些沒燒盡的黃金或有價寶石。在殯儀館，這些東西被稱為「民俗小費」。撿到工作人員會將之換成現金，請大家吃頓飯後全數捐給社福單位。
有錢就能幸福嗎？想起殯儀館裡的大體，和醫院裡身家上億卻只能躺在床上的老人們，師兄不無感嘆地說：「我現在還可以走，就已經贏過他們了」。
親人過世最難面對的是「自責」 不如珍惜當下人生活在當下的道理，人人都懂，實際能做到的卻很少。 殯儀館裡，總是不乏後悔的人。大師兄舉例，曾有位從美國回來的兒子天天在冰庫前哭泣，對過世的爸爸說：「我真的好想你，我以前為什麼沒時間陪你……」
大師兄說，現在的他，對死亡已有豁達的體悟：「我希望我的人生就是盡情地玩，然後沒有後悔地走，最後用免費的聯合公祭送我就好。」他還笑說，如果自己得了癌症，一定會請朋友吃飯，要大家先將白包給他：「反正我走了就用不到了！」
所以，幸福到底是什麼？
這個困難的問題，答案或許意外地如師兄所言般簡單：「現在，我只要能吃飯就覺得很快樂，一早起床能呼吸就覺得很愉快！
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