選擇和承擔代價
惟雯說故事
有一次,兒子和同學打架打輸了,還被打的傷痕累累,回到家裡後,哭鬧不止。
媽媽問他:「跟人打架了?被揍了?」
兒子說:「嗯,嗯。」
媽媽:「現在是不是覺得很委屈?」
兒子哭著說:「很委屈!」
媽媽:「很憤怒?」
兒嚎啕著:「很憤怒!」。
媽媽:「你打算怎麼辦,需要媽媽為你做點什麼?」
兒子略顯激動的說:「媽媽,我要找塊磚頭,明天從背後去砸他!」
媽媽:「嗯,我看行!媽媽明天為你準備磚頭。」
媽媽繼續問:「還有呢?」
兒子更激動了,「媽媽,你給我弄把刀,我明天從背後去捅他!」
媽媽:「好!這個更解氣,媽媽這就去準備一下。」
媽媽上樓去準備東西了,得到媽媽的理解和支持後,兒子也漸漸平靜了下來。
過了半小時後,媽媽從樓上搬一大堆衣服及棉被下來。
兒子不解,問:「媽媽,你搬那麼多衣服被子幹嘛?」
媽媽:「兒子,你決定了嗎?是用磚頭,還是用刀呀?」
媽媽:「兒子,是這樣的:如果你用磚頭砸他,那麼警察就會把我們帶走,在監獄裡可能要待上一個月,我們就帶些短衣薄被就可以;如果你用刀子捅他,那麼我們在監獄裡至少三年回不來,這樣我們就要多帶些衣服和被子。」
媽媽接著說:「所以,兒子你決定了嗎?媽媽永遠支持你!」
兒子驚愕道:「要這樣?」
媽媽:「是這樣的,法律是這樣規定的!」媽媽趁機科普了一下法律常識。
兒子低聲的說:「媽媽,那我們就不幹了吧?」
媽媽:「兒子,你不是很憤怒嗎?」
兒子稍微有點臉紅,說:「媽媽,我已經不憤怒了,其實我也有錯。」
從此,兒子學會了選擇和代價。
啓示—-
父母是孩子成長道路上的引路人,如何引導孩子在成長過程中不誤入歧途,而能順利走向正途,是父母所該認真思考的問題。
當孩子遇到問題時,不應該一味的指責他的錯誤,畢竟此時的孩子分不清對與錯,只知道自己受了委屈,若一味指責他的錯誤,反而容易造成叛逆反效果。
這位母親在處理孩子的問題時,先給予認同再給予鼓勵,如此可培養孩子擁有獨立思考的能力,可以自己獨立解決問題,但必須也懂得承擔後果,這才是一種高情商的愛的教育方式。
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