搶救人緣
惟雯說故事
你相信嗎？
我認識一個女孩，她說，她在補習班上課，準備重考大學的一年期間，沒有認識班上任何一位同學。
真的，她一向獨來獨往，上課時間到，就走進教室，下完課，就獨自回家去，一年之中，未曾和其他同學說過話；這就是她的風格—-「不喜歡主動和他人交談」。
現在她大學畢業，工作多年，也一直未婚。
曾有一職員，在工作上犯了錯誤，當長官指責他時，他反駁說：
「沒有人告訴我不能這麼做啊！」
長官聽了，很生氣地說：「什麼叫『沒有人告訴你』？你有主動問過其他同事、或來問過我嗎？如果你懂得主動請教別人，你會犯這麼嚴重的錯誤嗎？」
是的，當我們到一個新的或陌生的環境，都需要調適自己的心境，並提升「與他人交往的能力」；因為，在工作場合中，最忌「獨行俠」—-獨來獨往、擺冷面孔、不主動認識別人、不主動請教他人！
所以，我們必須學習，將「自信與友善寫在臉上」，讓別人可以清楚地看得到。
不過，自信並非是「自吹自擂」，深怕別人不能記得自己的長處；其實，和他人初次見面，愈是表現出「我是憨厚的老實人」，愈能激起別人樂意和我們交往的意願。如果說話「愛吹牛、又誇張」，只是忙著吹噓自己、推銷自己，就會惹人厭啊！
假如，我們需要「搶救人緣、改頭換面」，不妨試試：
1.趕快打個電話、寫信、或 e-mail 給一些久未連絡的朋友。
2.拜託朋友一些小事，並反問他，你是否可以幫他做些什麼？
3.約些朋友來喝喝茶、聊聊天、敘敘舊。
4.談話時，「多發問、多傾聽」，可引導對方發言，維持良好氣氛。
5.多談論對方「感興趣的話題」，讓對方暢所欲言。
6.多注意自己的表情，並把最愉悅的神情，留給對方。
7.尊重對方的意見，切勿經常「否定、反駁」對方。
8.多主動請教「對方的專長」，並適度讚美。
摘自戴晨志著「人際溝通高手」
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