活出人生意義
惟雯說故事
事實上，我們大部分的人，對於自己為何會在這個世上一無所知。
心理學家威廉．莫頓（William Morton）做過一項研究，詢問三千位受訪者：「我為了什麼而活？」
有高達94%的受訪者表示，他們的人生沒有明確的目標。
果真如此的話，一般人的人生是過得「不快樂」吧！
「不快樂」就是「不知道自己想要什麼？」。
我們每個人都需要為自己找出存在的意義。
亦即我們需要找出人生存在的目的，有目的人生才會產生意義。
找出人生存在的目的幫我們發現：
對自己一生最重要的是什麼？
為什麼自己會來到這世間？
自己的使命是什麼？
華理克（Rick Warren）在暢銷書《標竿人生》（The Purpose-Driven Life）裡更進一步地探索目的：「少了目的，人生就變成毫無意義的動作，毫無方向的活動，毫無道理的事件。少了目的，人生就變得微不足道、瑣碎低微、了無生趣。最慘的悲劇不是死亡，而是毫無目的的人生。」
但是，我們該如何發現人生的目的呢？如何過有意義的人生呢？
坡．布朗森（Po Bronson）在暢銷書《這輩子，你該做什麼？》（What Should I Do With My Life?）裡提到，每個人都有真正的目的，只是需要努力找出來，因為我們不見得都會突然頓悟。
他寫道，「目的不會像命運一樣，已經完整打包好等著你，…我們只會聽到悄悄的低語，感受到一股莫名的衝動，目的就是那樣開始的。」
當然，目的是藏在我們心靈的深處，要哄它出來並非易事，需要下很大的工夫。
當你開始思考自己人生的真正目的時，就已經踏上探索的旅程了。
亦即，你已冥冥之中走向對你最重要的事物，而你要前往之路，也會愈來愈清晰了。
在真實故事改編的電影《心靈投手》（The Rookie）裡，有一幕非常鼓舞人心。
丹尼斯．奎德（Dennis Quaid）飾演一位四十歲的棒球投手，二十年前曾試圖躋身大聯盟，但失敗了，如今仍不放棄夢想。
為了再度嘗試，他需要放棄教職，那也對家裡的經濟狀況產生了很大的衝擊。
他去找父親指點迷津，父親告訴他：「在你找出天賦以前，放手做你覺得該做的事情沒有關係。」
結果他在四十歲那年，以新手之姿擠進了大聯盟。
切記，如果你不知道自己的人生目標在哪裡？
那麼，先走在路上吧！
用心感受路上景物，讓心指引你邁向人生正確的方向。
以下提供幾個探索自己內心真正目的的方法﹕
- 定義什麼對你最重要。
列出讓你有更好的理由起床，並以期待與興奮的心情，征服每一天的人物、理念、活動、商業興趣和夢想。
- 定義你對美好世界的遠景。
寫下你覺得最能服務他人的理念或有意義的活動，例如環保、政治，關心孩童肥胖問題、關心遊民困境、關心虐童事件或癌症治療。總之你的遠景，就是你要去追求之人事物。
- 用心看得更清楚。
接觸那些點燃你熱情的東西、理念或活動。精進你擅長的事物，那些帶給你無限樂趣、讓你忘了時間飛逝的東西。
- 消去法。
有時候用消去法，淘汰顯然跟你的目標和熱情不符的東西比較容易。很多人被困在跟自己的志業或熱情不符的事物中。例如，我們窩在角落的辦公間裡，心想：「我是怎麼來這裡的？」
了解你不想變成什麼樣子，朝著你想要的人生邁進。
- 列出你的「崇拜」清單。
寫下你崇拜的名人或非名人，以及你崇拜他們的理由。你可能因為歐普拉善於激勵人心而崇拜她，或是因為勞勃．瑞福（Robert Redford）以日舞基金會（Sundance Foundation）鼓勵創意而崇拜他。你可能因為父母或家族成員對你幼時的啟發，以及灌輸你現在的核心價值觀而崇拜他們。當你了解你崇拜他人的原因時，可以直接引導你往自己的目標邁進。
- 留意心之所欲。
列出你為了實現志業，需要採取的短期行動和長期行動。你可能想要重新思考你目前的工作，你可能想要創業或加入一家比較符合你的目的和熱情的公司。重點是採取行動，留意內心的召喚。
- 獲利之外也要創造意義。
人生的一大挑戰，是在獲利之外也創造意義，那平衡很難拿捏，但很值得你花心思讓你的目的與荷包相互呼應。
最終，誠如坡．布朗森說過：「人生的目的在於忠於自我。」
而經典著作《小王子》的作者聖修伯里也曾說：「真正用心，才能看清事物。」
唯有當你真的對自己做的事情充滿熱情，時間才能過得飛快，你才不會一直盯著時鐘，不介意多做幾個小時，因為熱情就能提供你持久的能量。當你熱中某個事物時，工作和玩樂之間的分界通常會開始模糊起來。
所以魯米（Rumi）也說：「讓你所愛，成你所為。」
總之，我們只有在找到真正的人生目的及熱情時，才算是真的成功。
說到真正的人生目的和熱情，你要注意心之所欲，去發現什麼對你來說，是真正的重要人事物？
用心聆聽你內心的召喚，你也會變得快樂許多。
切記，成功不是快樂的關鍵，快樂才是開啟成功大門的鑰匙。
如果你找到人生活著的意義，對人生充滿熱情，熱愛你做的事，就會找到愛默生歌頌的「真正成功」。
以下是幫你發掘與激發熱情的一些思考點：
- 知道自己最擅長什麼。
你需要誠實面對自己，你在哪方面做得比多數人好？可能是烤蘋果派、唱歌、熱舞、做的商業簡報吸引人、關懷他人、熱情的情人。
- 回想喜悅。
想想你人生中滿心開懷的時刻，那是什麼情況？什麼環境？什麼特殊事件讓你產生共鳴？是孩子誕生嗎？是獲得期待已久的升遷嗎？是通過考試嗎？是你最愛的球隊贏得冠軍嗎？還是你在花園裡照顧玫瑰的時候嗎？
- 找出時間飛逝的時候。
是什麼事情讓你每次都做到忘了時間？是看電影或讀好書？寫作？畫畫？有意義的專案？做焗烤茄子？陪孩子玩耍或教孩子做功課？想想你何時忘了看時鐘，你可能很投入那件事。
- 回想兒時的夢想。
還記得你小時候充滿好奇嗎？你以前夢想什麼？你夢想成為舞者嗎？小說家？名廚？好父母？發明家？創業家？有時候回想過去有助於邁向未來，點燃內在的熱情。
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