顏值與人品孰重？
楊惟雯
為何有人光鮮亮麗卻咄咄逼人，讓人窒息？有人其貌不揚，卻讓人舒服、心生好感？你身邊是否也有這樣的人，他們也許貌不驚人，也許才不出眾，卻在無形中有著一股特別的魅力，讓你想要與之接近，放下心防，傾訴心中的秘密？
欣賞一個人，從表到裡，可分為五個層次：外貌，能力，脾氣，品格，品性。
而與之對應的素質，同樣可分為五個層次：顏值，才華，性格，善良，人品。
細細品味，這五個層次，既是待人處世的識人之法，也是涵養內心的修行之途。
亦即，欣賞一個人，始于顏值，敬于才華，合於性格，久于善良，終於人品——這便是那條完整的路徑。
我們依序解剖這五個層次如下：
一、始于顏值
愛美之心，人皆有之。
自古人們便津津樂道於西施、貂蟬、王昭君、楊玉環的四大美女，潘安、蘭陵王、宋玉、衛玠的四大美男。只是古人眼中的顏值，不以美醜論英雄，而是關注氣色神采。
容貌是天生的，我們無從選擇。而說到顏值，容貌卻不是第一位的，第一位的是氣質和氣場。
而氣質和氣場從哪裡來？身上的閱歷，腦中的見識，心中的涵養。
最簡單的培養方法便是讀書，蘇東坡所謂“腹有詩書氣自華”，曾國藩所謂“讀書可變化氣質”。
總之，你的氣質裡，藏著你走過的路，讀過的書和愛過的人。
二、敬于才華
識人，是要觀其內；做人，要養於內。相由心生，成之於內，自會發之於外。
每個人都有自己的長處，都有別人所比不了的地方。重要的是發現自己的長處在哪裡，自己的長處是什麼？然後有意識地去培養和發展。
真正的才華與智慧，是一種見識。他們的魅力來自豐富、內斂、溫情、善良，由內而外的散發出一種氣質。這樣的人，可敬、可交、可做。
據說賀知章對李白一見傾心，初次見面時就解下身上金龜，抵押換酒與李白豪飲，這種對才華的敬慕與欣賞正是一種尊敬。
三、合於性格
好的性格沒有固定的定義，簡單的說，就是要讓別人喜歡你，拿出一張紙，把身邊10個朋友每個人身上你喜歡的性格寫下來，然後變成自己所擁有的，這就是好的性格。
物以類聚人以群分。同類性格的人容易合得來，投脾氣。
性格，一半是天生，一半是養成。而能與絕大多數人合得來，就需要有修養，溫和持重，如同古人所言，“望之儼然，即之也溫”！
有的人也許貌不驚人，卻有一種性格魅力，讓人舒服，讓人想要與之親近。
和這樣的人在一起，就像聽一曲舒緩的音樂，品一杯醇厚的熱茶，看一朵花靜靜地開放，平靜中含有淡淡的喜悅。
四、久于善良
善良就是與人為善，心有善念，便會給別人和自己帶來歡樂，所以古人說：“善為至寶，一生用之不盡；心作良田，百世耗之有餘。”
“善人者，人亦善之。”
李叔同早年做音樂教師，有一次上課，一個學生在下面看閒書，另一個學生則隨地吐痰。下課後，李叔同請那兩位同學留下來，用很緩和的聲音對他們說，下次上課不要看閒書或者隨地吐痰。
兩個學生剛要申辯，李叔同向他們鞠了一躬，兩個學生頓時滿臉通紅。
只有善良才有長久的影響力，當一個人心中只有善念的時候，一切塵世間的浮華光景早已退卻，只有一個個平等和應該尊重的靈魂。
當善良遇見善良，就會開出世界上最美的花朵。
五、終於人品
總的來說，欣賞一個人就是欣賞他的人品。
古人認為，“立德、立功、立言”是“三不朽”，首先就是“立德”。
同樣，做事先做人，關鍵看人品。
人品好的人，自帶光芒，無論走到哪裡，總會熠熠生輝。
人品好的人一定是細心體諒他人，極具同情心的，他的魅力來自豐富，內斂，溫情，慈悲，由內而外地散發出一種高貴。
人品好的人一定是細膩而聰明的，做事講道理，說話有分寸，能把每一句話都說到你心裡去，以柔克剛，化解問題於無聲之處。
有時，他只是一個眼神與舉動，都可以讓人感覺到這個世界的暖意。
總之，欣賞一個人，始于顏值，敬于才華，合於性格，久于善良，終於人品。
其實，做人如此，交友亦如此。若能如此，便是不枉此生。
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