悅己者王

悅己者王

惟雯說故事

 

不要追一匹馬,你用追馬的時間去種草,待春暖花開時,自然能吸引一批駿馬來供你選擇。

 

周國平也說:“在人世間的一切責任中,最根本的責任就是真正成為你自己,活出你獨特的個性和價值。”

 

不用刻意巴結一個人,忍住孤獨去提升自己的能力,待時機成熟時,便有一批朋友與你同行。

 

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一位詩人寫了不少的詩,也有了一點的名氣,

可是,與他有共嗚的人少。為此,詩人很苦惱。

 

詩人有位朋友,是位禪師。這天,詩人向禪師說了自己的苦惱。

禪師笑了,指著窗外一株茂盛的植物說:“你看,那是什麼花?”

詩人看了一眼植物說:“夜來香。”

 

禪師說:“對,這夜來香只在夜晚開放,所以大家才叫它夜來香。那你知道,夜來香為什麼不在白天開花,而在夜晚開花呢?”

詩人看了看禪師,搖了搖頭。

 

禪師笑著說:“夜晚開花,並無人注意,它開花,只為了取悅自己。”

詩人吃了一驚:“取悅自己?”

 

禪師笑道:“白天開放的花,都是為了引人注目,得到他人的讚賞。而這夜來香,在無人欣賞的情況下,依然開放自己,芳香自己,它只是為了讓自己快樂。一個人,難道還不如一株植物?”

 

禪師看了看詩人說道:“許多人,總是把自己快樂的鑰匙交給別人,自己所做的一切,都是在做給別人看,讓別人來讚賞,彷彿只有這樣才能快樂起來。其實,許多時候,我們應該為自己做事。”

 

詩人笑了,他說:“我懂了。一個人,不是活給別人看的,而是為自己而活,要做一個有意義的自己。”

 

禪師笑著點了點頭,又說:“一個人,只有取悅自己,才能不放棄自己;只有取悅自己,才能提升自己;只有取悅自己,才能影響他人。

要知道,夜來香夜晚開放,可我們許多人,卻是枕著它的芳香入夢啊。”

 

*********************************************************

我們活著,不是為了取悅這個世界。

取悅自己,也不是自私,而是記得初心,才知道要往哪裡去。

取悅自己,也是讓自己變得更美好的同時,也讓身邊的人,身邊的事,變得快樂和美好。

 

莫言在諾貝爾文學獎頒獎典禮上,說自己長得醜:小時候村裡很多人當面嘲笑他:“你瞧你那個熊樣!”

學校裡有幾個性格霸蠻的同學甚至為此打他。

 

莫言為此常常流淚,母親卻對他說:“兒子,你不醜,你不缺鼻子不缺眼,四肢健全,醜在哪裡?只要你心存善良,多做好事,即使是醜也能變美。”

 

楊瀾一次採訪當當網的董事長創始人俞渝,問她:“你最不自信的地方在哪?”

她說:“長相。”

 

為此,她曾經自卑過,可是後來她在事業上獲得了成功。

於是,楊瀾又問:“為什麼隨著年齡的增長,你反而越來越自信,越有氣質和光芒了呢?”

她回答:“接受自己。”

楊瀾聽了忍不住讚歎,說這一點值得許多女性借鑒。

 

唐代詩人張九齡在《感遇十二首》中寫道:“草木有本心,何求美人折。”

草木求美本是自然的天性,又何須求美人的採擷呢?

你有才華、有美貌,那是為了你自己,而不是為了求別人欣賞、喜歡。你若盛開,清風自來;你若精彩,天自安排。

 

高高興興地接納自己,不僅包括對自我價值的肯定,還包括對自己不足甚至殘缺的接納,對失敗挫折的包容。

然後,改變自己,成為最好的自己。

這就是,悅人者眾,悅己者王。

 

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